Listen, he doesn't know what a podcast his, but for his very first podcast episode, Ron Burgundy pretty much nailed it. "The Ron Burgundy Podcast" has officially arrived, kicking off with its inaugural episode and it's everything you've ever wanted from San Diego's top-rated newsman. We're all in a glass case of emotion.

Episode One of "The Ron Burgundy Podcast" talks about one of the most popular genres of podcasts: True Crime. But, before he dives in to discussing cases like The Zodiac Killer, Burgundy unknowingly gives fans a little ASMR while he eats an apple and sips some coffee without realizing the mic was on. Then, after introducing his co-host, writer and producer Carolina Barlow, he jumps into a movie review of A Star Is Born.

According to Burgundy, he's a fan of the movie because "someone finally told [his] story." He said, "I've never spoken to Bradley Cooper but he obviously knows who I am. I used to hide my singing voice just like Goo Goo Gaga [Lady Gaga]. But now I'm more brazen than ever. There aren't enough stories out there about straight, white, red-blooded males and when I saw that my story was finally being told, I tell ya, I was shaking in my boots. That being said, I did leave as soon as I finished my popcorn, got some more and then drove home. So, I didn't quite finish seeing the movie." Also, after calling Lady Gaga ("Goo Goo Gaga" as he refers to her) a "real talent," he pondered where her stage name comes from. But, that's for another episode.

Then, it was time to talk True Crime and started with a murder involving a woman killing her husband by stabbing him to death. Burgundy said, "After her arrest, they interrogated her for a cool 20 minutes. In the interrogation room, McKenzie confessed that proceeding a jealous row, she did indeed kill him. The jury sentenced her to 20 to life, and that was that. So we got one down."

Murder case two was surrounding one Fred Oxhorn, a local bartender who gruesomely killed his victims in the Sierra Nevada mountains. It turns out, Burgundy and Oxhorn are old pals. "By the stars of CGI, it's Fred. Oh, Fred. I know Fred. I love Fred," Ron recalled. "He was one of my favorite bartenders in Pasadena. He bartended at the 35er. He's great. What a great guy." Then, declaring that there's no way Oxhorn could be a murderer, he asked Caroina to remind him to give the now inmate a call to "set up a lunch date" and go "hiking in the Anza-Borrego desert."

If you were unfamiliar with either murders, Burgundy moved on to one that is very famous: The Zodiac Killer. He then believed he discovered the Zodiac Killer's true identity, based on an internet rumor. He explained, "Interesting background for the Zodiac Killer, he was raised in Houston, Texas and he actually attended Princeton and then Harvard Law. Pretty impressive," Ron explained. "He worked in the White House for George W. Bush, was instrumental in the 2000 Florida Presidential recount and is now working as a Senator in Texas. Born Raphael Edward Cruz, he changed his name to appear more American and is now called Ted Cruz. And he's doing quite well for himself. His wife just revealed that they cannot afford a second home, but to suffer is to be human. So that just goes to show, it doesn't matter how many people you kill in San Francisco, you'll be just fine."

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